As I walked through the dark to get to my camper tonight, I heard something breathing heavily behind the trees…I quickly pulled my camper door shut behind me as I jumped inside. I lay down on my bed to think. I turned on some soft music but quickly turned it off again so I could hear what was going on outside my window. Then I grabbed my laptop to type down some thoughts.
When I first moved into the camper, I mentally fought being basically homeless. I had lost almost every material thing I owned. Yet, it really wasn’t my fault. It is just the way things happened. And then my further choices ended up looking like the wrong choices. Still, I believe they were not the wrong choices. I did what I knew best at the time.
I was somewhat prepared for this journey. And now I have another full time job to keep me afloat. Still, it will not be enough wages to start all over. But I’m not going to fret anymore. I am accepting all of this as part of my journey here on earth. And, oh my, what adventures I’m finding living here in the woods. I drive to the valley to work during the week days and then come back to my camper in the evening.
It is very different living in a quiet little camper than living in a house or mobile home. The temperature is the same outside as it is inside. I have a thermometer to prove it! Yes, it was pretty hot this summer. It was not easy especially …oh, my…I hear something breathing just outside my camper window…I wonder if it is a bear. I can hear it kind of snorting. I think it is sniffing to try and tell what I am and where I am. I would have screamed probably a few months ago when I first moved into the camper. But I’m starting to get use to these night time sounds…a little. It still gets my adrenaline up though, especially when the sound is so close by. It is hard to tell the exact distance of sounds in these western woods. Sound travels different than in the valley or even than in the East.
Anyway, it might be a deer that is breathing and snorting out there. I thought I heard it earlier. I also heard some crashing further away. It might be hiding by my camper from a dog or mountain lion. I bet it is afraid of me too, whatever it is.
Okay. It is quiet again out there. But I think that whatever is out there is very close. Now what was I talking about earlier…Oh! Something just hit my flimsy screen. My window is open and all that is between me and the dark out there is this little screen. Let me tell you, I just jumped about 3 inches off my bed. But I think it was a moth that saw my light and hit the screen trying to get in.
I’m not getting very far tonight in writing this blog. But think I will close for now and lay here to listen to what is happening outside. It sounds quite interesting sometimes. I have to use my imagination to fill in what I cannot see in the dark. And it is very dark in these woods at night. Sometimes I want to cry because I hear a terrible little scream and know a small animal just got killed and is being eaten. Other times it is the wild night birds making the most unusual sounds. Sometimes they don’t even sound real. These are not the owls that I’m talking about. There are other birds that live here and come awake at night. We seldom hear about them in books or on television. Let me tell you; they live in these woods! And I live in the woods with them, very close.